第46章BOOKTHESECOND：THEGOLDENTHREAD(29)

第46章bookthesecond：thegoldenthread(29)

hehadlovedluciemanettefromthehourofhisdanger.hehadneverheardasoundsosweetanddearasthesoundofhercompassionatevoice；hehadneverseenafacesotenderlybeautiful，asherswhenitwasconfrontedwithhisownontheedgeofthegravethathadbeendugforhim.but，hehadnotyetspokentoheronthesubject；theassassinationatthedesertedchateaufarawaybeyondtheheavingwater，andthelong，long，dustyroads—thesolidstonechateauwhichhaditselfbecomethemeremistofadream—hadbeendoneayear，andhehadneveryet，bysomuchasasinglespokenword，disclosedtoherthestateofhisheart.

thathehadhisreasonsforthis，heknewfullwell.itwasagainasummerdaywhen，latelyarrivedinlondonfromhiscollegeoccupation，heturnedintothequietcornerinsoho，bentonseekinganopportunityofopeninghismindtodoctormanette.itwasthecloseofthesummerday，andheknewlucietobeoutwithmisspross.

hefoundthedoctorreadinginhisarmchairatawindow.theenergywhichhadatoncesupportedhimunderhisoldsufferingsandaggravatedtheirsharpness，hadbeengraduallyrestoredtohim.hewasnowaveryenergeticmanindeed，withgreatfirmnessofpurpose，strengthofresolution，andvigourofaction.inhisrecoveredenergyhewassometimesalittlefitfulandsudden，ashehadatfirstbeenintheexerciseofhisotherrecoveredfaculties；but，thishadneverbeenfrequentlyobservable，andhadgrownmoreandmorerare.

hestudiedmuch，sleptlittle，sustainedagreatdealoffatiguewithease，andwasequablycheerful.tohim，nowenteredcharlesdarnay，atsightofwhomhelaidasidehisbookandheldouthishand.

'charlesdarnay！irejoicetoseeyou.wehavebeencountingonyourreturnthesethreeorfourdayspast.mr.stryverandsydneycartonwerebothhereyesterday，andbothmadeyououttobemorethandue.'

'iamobligedtothemfortheirinterestinthematter，'heanswered，alittlecoldlyastothem，thoughverywarmlyastothedoctor.'missmanette—'

'iswell，'saidthedoctor，ashestoppedshort，'andyourreturnwilldelightusall.shehasgoneoutonsomehouseholdmatters，butwillsoonbehome.'

'doctormanette，iknewshewasfromhome.itooktheopportunityofherbeingfromhome，tobegtospeaktoyou.'

therewasablanksilence.

'yes？'saidthedoctor，withevidentconstraint.'bringyourchairhere，andspeakon.'

hecompliedastothechair，butappearedtofindthespeakingonlesseasy.

'ihavehadthehappiness，doctormanette，ofbeingsointimatehere，'soheatlengthbegan，'forsomeyearandahalf，thatihopethetopiconwhichiamabouttotouchmaynot—'hewasstayedbythedoctor'sputtingouthishandtostophim.whenhehadkeptitsoalittlewhile，hesaid，drawingitback：'isluciethetopic？'

'sheis.'

'itishardformetospeakofheratanytime.itisveryhardformetohearherspokenofinthattoneofyours，charlesdarnay.'

'itisatoneofferventadmiration，truehomage，anddeeplove，doctormanette！'hesaiddeferentially.

therewasanotherblanksilencebeforeherfatherrejoined：

'ibelieveit.idoyoujustice；ibelieveit.'

hisconstraintwassomanifest，anditwassomanifest，too，thatitoriginatedinanunwillingnesstoapproachthesubject，thatcharlesdarnayhesitated.

'shalligoon，sir？'

anotherblank.

'yes，goon.'

'youanticipatewhatiwouldsay，thoughyoucannotknowhowearnestlyisayit，howearnestlyifeelit，withoutknowingmysecretheart，andthehopesandfearsandanxietieswithwhichithaslongbeenladen.deardoctormanette，iloveyourdaughterfondly，dearly，disinterestedly，devotedly.ifevertherewereloveintheworld，iloveher.youhavelovedyourself；letyouroldlovespeakforme！'

thedoctorsatwithhisfaceturnedaway，andhiseyesbentontheground.atthelastwords，hestretchedouthishandagain，hurriedly，andcried：

'notthat，sir！letthatbe！iadjureyou，donotrecallthat！'

hiscrywassolikeacryofactualpain，thatitrangincharlesdarnay'searslongafterhehadceased.hemotionedwiththehandhehadextended，anditseemedtobeanappealtodarnaytopause.thelattersoreceivedit，andremainedsilent.

'iaskyourpardon，'saidthedoctor，inasubduedtone，andaftersomemoments.'idonotdoubtyourlovinglucie；youmaybesatisfiedofit.'

heturnedtowardshiminhischair，butdidnotlookathim，orraisehiseyes.hischindroppeduponhishand，andhiswhitehairovershadowedhisface：

'haveyouspokentolucie？'

'no.'

'norwritten？'

'never.'

'itwouldbeungeneroustoaffectnottoknowthatyourself-denialistobereferredtoyourconsiderationforherfather.herfatherthanksyou.'

heofferedhishand；buthiseyesdidnotgowithit.