第276章

第276章heglancedatherandwasstruckbytheserious,impassionedlookinherface.herfaceseemedtosay：“whyask？whydoubtofwhatyoucannotbutknow？whytalkwhennowordscanexpresswhatonefeels？”

shecamenearertohimandstopped.hetookherhandandkissedit.

“doyouloveme？”

“yes,yes,”saidnatasha,almostangrilyitseemed.shedrewadeepsigh,andanother,herbreathingcamemoreandmorequickly,andsheburstintosobs.

“whatisit？what’sthematter？”

“oh,iamsohappy,”sheanswered,smilingthroughhertears.shebentoverclosertohim,thoughtasecond,asthoughwonderingwhetheritwerepossible,andthenkissedhim.

princeandreyheldherhands,lookedintohereyesandcouldfindnotraceofhisformerloveforherinhisheart.somesuddenreactionseemedtohavetakenplaceinhissoul;therewasnoneofthepoeticandmysteriouscharmofdesireleftinit;insteadofthattherewaspityforherfeminineandchildishweakness,terroratherdevotionandtrustfulness,anirksome,yetsweet,senseofduty,bindinghimtoherforever.theactualfeeling,thoughnotsojoyousandpoeticalastheformerfeeling,wasmoreseriousanddeeper.

“didyourmammatellyouthatitcannotbeforayear？”saidprinceandrey,stillgazingintohereyes.

“canthisbei,thebaby-girl（aseveryoneusedtocallme）？”natashawasthinking.“canireallybefromthisminuteawife,onalevelwiththisunknown,charming,intellectualman,whoislookeduptoevenbymyfather？canitbetrue？canitbetruethatnowtherecanbenomoreplayingwithlife,thatnowiamgrownup,thatnowaresponsibilityislaiduponmeforeverywordandaction？oh,whatdidheaskme？”

“no,”sheanswered,butshehadnotunderstoodhisquestion.

“forgiveme,”saidprinceandrey,“butyouaresoyoung,andihavehadsomuchexperienceoflife.iamafraidforyou.youdon’tknowyourself.”

natashalistenedwithconcentratedattention,tryingtotakeinthemeaningofhiswords;butshedidnotunderstandthem

“hardasthatyearwillbetome,delayingmyhappiness,”continuedprinceandrey,“inthattimeyouwillbesureofyourself.ibegyoutomakemehappyinayear,butyouarefree;ourengagementshallbekeptasecret,andifyoushouldfindoutthatyoudonotloveme,orifyoushouldcometolove…”saidprinceandreywithaforcedsmile.

“whydoyousaythat？”natashainterrupted.“youknowthatfromtheverydaywhenyoufirstcametootradnoe,ihavelovedyou,”shesaid,firmlypersuadedthatshewasspeakingthetruth.

“inayearyouwilllearntoknowyourself.…”

“awho-oleyear！”criednatashasuddenly,onlynowgraspingthattheirmarriagewastobedeferredforayear.“butwhyayear？…whyayear？…”

princeandreybegantoexplaintoherthereasonsforthisdelay.natashadidnothearhim.

“andcan’titbehelped？”sheasked.princeandreymadenoreply,buthisfaceexpressedtheimpossibilityofalteringthisdecision.

“that’sawful！oh,it’sawful,awful！”natashacriedsuddenly,andshebrokeintosobsagain.“ishalldieifihavetowaitayear;it’simpossible,it’sawful.”sheglancedatherlover’sfaceandsawthelookofsympatheticpainandperplexityonit.

“no,no,i’lldoanything,”shesaid,suddenlycheckinghertears;“i’msohappy！”

herfatherandmothercameintotheroomandgavethebetrothedcoupletheirblessing.fromthatdayprinceandreybegantovisittherostovsasnatasha’saffiancedlover.