第107章

第107章someonesaidthatcaptaintushinwasclosebyhereinthevillage,andthathehadalreadybeensentfor.

“oh,butyouwentthere,”saidprincebagration,addressingprinceandrey.

“tobesure,werodetherealmosttogether,”saidthestaff-officer,smilingaffablytobolkonsky.

“ihadnotthepleasureofseeingyou,”saidprinceandrey,coldlyandabruptly.everyonewassilent.

tushinappearedinthedoorway,timidlyedginginbehindthegenerals’backs.makinghiswayroundthegeneralsinthecrowdedhut,embarrassedashealwayswasbeforehissuperiorofficers,tushindidnotseetheflag-staffandtumbledoverit.severaloftheofficerslaughed.

“howwasitacannonwasabandoned？”askedbagration,frowning,notsomuchatthecaptainasatthelaughingofficers,amongwhomzherkov’slaughwastheloudest.onlynowinthepresenceoftheangry-lookingcommander,tushinconceivedinallitsawfulnessthecrimeanddisgraceofhisbeingstillalivewhenhehadlosttwocannons.hehadbeensoexcitedthattillthatinstanthehadnothadtimetothinkofthat.theofficers’laughterhadbewilderedhimstillmore.hestoodbeforebagration,hislowerjawquivering,andcouldscarcelyarticulate：

“idon’tknow…yourexcellency…ihadn’tthemen,yourexcellency.”

“youcouldhavegotthemfromthebattalionsthatwerecoveringyourposition！”thattherewerenobattalionstherewaswhattushindidnotsay,thoughitwasthefact.hewasafraidofgettinganotherofficerintotroublebysayingthat,andwithoututteringawordhegazedstraightintobagration’sface,asaconfusedschoolboygazesatthefaceofanexaminer.

thesilencewasratheralengthyone.princebagration,thoughhehadnowishtobesevere,apparentlyfoundnothingtosay;theothersdidnotventuretointervene.princeandreywaslookingfromunderhisbrowsattushinandhisfingersmovednervously.

“yourexcellency,”princeandreybrokethesilencewithhisabruptvoice,“yousentmetocaptaintushin’sbattery.iwentthereandfoundtwo-thirdsofthemenandhorseskilled,twocannonsdisabledandnoforcesneartodefendthem.”

princebagrationandtushinlookednowwithequalintensityatbolkonsky,ashewentonspeakingwithsuppressedemotion.

“andifyourexcellencywillpermitmetoexpressmyopinion,”hewenton,“weowetheessofthedaymoretotheactionofthatbatteryandtheheroicsteadinessofcaptaintushinandhismenthantoanythingelse,”saidprinceandrey,andhegotupatonceandwalkedawayfromthetable,withoutwaitingforareply.

princebagrationlookedattushinand,apparentlyloathtoexpresshisdisbeliefinbolkonsky’soff-handedjudgment,yetunabletoputcompletefaithinit,hebenthisheadandsaidtotushinthathecouldgo.princeandreywalkedoutafterhim.

“thanks,mydearfellow,yougotmeoutofascrape,”tushinsaidtohim.

princeandreylookedattushin,andwalkedawaywithoututteringaword.princeandreyfeltbitterandmelancholy.itwasallsostrange,sounlikewhathehadbeenhopingfor.

“whoarethey？whyaretheyhere？whatdotheywant？andwhenwillitallend？”thoughtrostov,lookingattheshadowyfiguresthatkeptflittingbeforehiseyes.thepaininhisarmbecameevenmoreagonising.hewasheavywithsleep,crimsoncirclesdancedbeforehiseyes,andtheimpressionofthesevoicesandthesefacesandthesenseofhislonelinessallblendedwiththemiseryofthepain.itwasthey,thesesoldiers,woundedandunhurtalike,itwastheycrushingandweighinguponhim,andtwistinghisveinsandburningthefleshinhissprainedarmandshoulder.togetridofthemheclosedhiseyes.

hedozedoffforaminute,butinthatbriefintervalhedreamedofinnumerablethings.hesawhismotherandherlarge,whitehand;hesawsonya’sthinshoulders,natasha’seyesandherlaugh,anddenisovwithhisvoiceandhiswhiskers,andtelyanin,andalltheaffairwithtelyaninandbogdanitch.allthataffairwasinextricablymixedupwiththissoldierwiththeharshvoice,andthataffairandthissoldierhereweresoagonisingly,soruthlesslypulling,crushing,andtwistinghisarmalwaysinthesamedirection.hewastryingtogetawayfromthem,buttheywouldnotletgoofhisshoulderforasecond.itwouldnotache,itwouldbeallrightiftheywouldn’tdragatit;buttherewasnogettingridofthem.

heopenedhiseyesandlookedupwards.theblackpallofdarknesshungonlyafewfeetabovethelightofthefire.inthelightflutteredtinyflakesoffallingsnow.tushinhadnotreturned,thedoctorhadnotcome.hewasalone,onlyasoldierwassittingnownakedontheothersideofthefire,warminghisthin,yellowbody.

“nobodycaresforme！”thoughtrostov.“noonetohelpme,noonetofeelsorryforme.anditoowasonceathome,andstrong,andhappyandloved,”hesighed,andwiththesighunconsciouslyhemoaned.

“inpain,eh？”askedthesoldier,shakinghisshirtoutbeforethefire,andwithoutwaitingforananswer,headdedhuskily：“ah,whatalotoffellowsdoneforto-day—awful！”

rostovdidnothearthesoldier.hegazedatthesnowflakeswhirlingoverthefireandthoughtoftherussianwinterwithhiswarm,brightlylightedhome,hiscosyfurcloak,hisswiftsledge,hisgoodhealth,andalltheloveandtendernessofhisfamily.“andwhatdidicomeherefor！”hewondered.

onthenextday,thefrenchdidnotrenewtheattackandtheremnantofbagration’sdetachmentjoinedkutuzov’sarmy.