第9章

第9章“iwasshutupinaroomwherethereisaghosttillafterdark.”

isawmr.lloydsmileandfrownatthesametime.

“ghost!what,youareababyafterall!youareafraidofghosts?”

“ofmr.reed’sghostiam:hediedinthatroom,andwaslaidoutthere.neitherbessienoranyoneelsewillgointoitatnight,iftheycanhelpit;anditwascrueltoshutmeupalonewithoutacandle,—socruelthatithinkishallneverforgetit.”

“nonsense!andisitthatmakesyousomiserable?areyouafraidnowindaylight?”

“no:butnightwillcomeagainbeforelong:andbesides,—iamunhappy,—veryunhappy,forotherthings.”

“whatotherthings?canyoutellmesomeofthem?”

howmuchiwishedtoreplyfullytothisquestion!howdifficultitwastoframeanyanswer!childrencanfeel,buttheycannotanalysetheirfeelings;andiftheanalysisispartiallyeffectedinthought,theyknownothowtoexpresstheresultoftheprocessinwords.fearful,however,oflosingthisfirstandonlyopportunityofrelievingmygriefbyimpartingit,i,afteradisturbedpause,contrivedtoframeameagre,though,asfarasitwent,trueresponse.

“foronething,ihavenofatherormother,brothersorsisters.”

“youhaveakindauntandcousins.”

againipaused;thenbunglinglyenounced—

“butjohnreedknockedmedown,andmyauntshutmeupinthered-room.”

mr.lloydasecondtimeproducedhissnuff-box.

“don’tyouthinkgatesheadhallaverybeautifulhouse?”askedhe.“areyounotverythankfultohavesuchafineplacetoliveat?”

“itisnotmyhouse,sir;andabbotsaysihavelessrighttobeherethanaservant.”

“pooh!youcan’tbesillyenoughtowishtoleavesuchasplendidplace?”

“ifihadanywhereelsetogo,ishouldbegladtoleaveit;buticannevergetawayfromgatesheadtilliamawoman.”

“perhapsyoumay—whoknows?haveyouanyrelationsbesidesmrs.reed?”

“ithinknot,sir.”

“nonebelongingtoyourfather?”

“idon’tknow.iaskedauntreedonce,andshesaidpossiblyimighthavesomepoor,lowrelationscalledeyre,butsheknewnothingaboutthem.”

“ifyouhadsuch,wouldyouliketogotothem?”

ireflected.povertylooksgrimtogrownpeople;stillmoresotochildren:theyhavenotmuchideaofindustrious,working,respectablepoverty;theythinkofthewordonlyasconnectedwithedclothes,scantyfood,firelessgrates,rudemanners,anddebasingvices:povertyformewassynonymouswithdegradation.

“no;ishouldnotliketobelongtopoorpeople,”wasmyreply.

“noteveniftheywerekindtoyou?”

ishookmyhead:icouldnotseehowpoorpeoplehadthemeansofbeingkind;andthentolearntospeaklikethem,toadopttheirmanners,tobeuneducated,togrowuplikeoneofthepoorwomenisawsometimesnursingtheirchildrenorwashingtheirclothesatthecottagedoorsofthevillageofgateshead:no,iwasnotheroicenoughtopurchaselibertyatthepriceofcaste.

“butareyourrelativessoverypoor?aretheyworkingpeople?”

“icannottell;aunt.reedsaysifihaveany,theymustbeaarlyset:ishouldnotliketogoaing.”

无一错一首一发一内一容一在一6一9一书一吧一看！

“wouldyouliketogotoschool?”