第152章
第152章“andyoudaredtocallmeaswitness?”hesaid,goinguptopyotrpetrovitch.
“whatdoyoumean?whatareyoutalkingabout?”mutteredluzhin.
“imeanthatyou…areaslanderer,that’swhatmywordsmean!”lebeziatnikovsaidhotly,lookingsternlyathimwithhisshort-sightedeyes.
hewasextremelyangry.raskolnikovgazedintentlyathim,asthoughseizingandweighingeachword.againtherewasasilence.pyotrpetrovitchindeedseemedalmostdumbfoundedforthefirstmoment.
“ifyoumeanthatforme,…”hebegan,stammering.“butwhat’sthematterwithyou?areyououtofyourmind?”
“i’minmymind,butyouareascoundrel!ah,howvile!ihaveheardeverything.ikeptwaitingonpurposetounderstandit,forimustownevennowitisnotquitelogical.…whatyouhavedoneitallforican’tunderstand.”
“why,whathaveidonethen?giveovertalkinginyournonsensicalriddles!ormaybeyouaredrunk!”
“youmaybeadrunkard,perhaps,vileman,butiamnot!inevertouchvodka,forit’sagainstmyconvictions.wouldyoubelieveit,he,hehimself,withhisownhandsgavesofyasemyonovnathathundred-roublenote—isawit,iwasawitness,i’lltakemyoath!hedidit,he!”repeatedlebeziatnikov,addressingall.
“areyoucrazy,milksop?”squealedluzhin.“sheisherselfbeforeyou—sheherselfheredeclaredjustnowbeforeeveryonethatigaveheronlytenroubles.howcouldihavegivenittoher?”
“isawit,isawit,”lebeziatnikovrepeated,“andthoughitisagainstmyprinciples,iamreadythisveryminutetotakeanyoathyoulikebeforethecourt,forisawhowyouslippeditinherpocket.onlylikeafoolithoughtyoudiditoutofkindness!whenyouweresayinggood-byetoheratthedoor,whileyouheldherhandinonehand,withtheother,theleft,youslippedthenoteintoherpocket.isawit,isawit!”
luzhinturnedpale.
“whatlies!”hecriedimpudently,“why,howcouldyou,standingbythewindow,seethenote?youfancieditwithyourshort-sightedeyes.youareraving!”
“no,ididn’tfancyit.andthoughiwasstandingsomewayoff,isawitall.andthoughitcertainlywouldbehardtodistinguishanotefromthewindow—that’strue—iknewforcertainthatitwasahundred-roublenote,because,whenyouweregoingtogivesofyasemyonovnatenroubles,youtookupfromthetableahundred-roublenote(isawitbecauseiwasstandingnearthen,andanideastruckmeatonce,sothatididnotforgetyouhaditinyourhand).youfoldeditandkeptitinyourhandallthetime.ididn’tthinkofitagainuntil,whenyouweregettingup,youchangeditfromyourrighthandtoyourleftandnearlydroppedit!inoticeditbecausethesameideastruckmeagain,thatyoumeanttodoherakindnesswithoutmyseeing.youcanfancyhowiwatchedyouandisawhowyoueededinslippingitintoherpocket.isawit,isawit,i’lltakemyoath.”
lebeziatnikovwasalmostbreathless.exclamationsaroseonallhandschieflyexpressiveofwonder,butsomeweremenacingintone.theyallcrowdedroundpyotrpetrovitch.katerinaivanovnaflewtolebeziatnikov.
“iwasmistakeninyou!protecther!youaretheonlyonetotakeherpart!sheisanorphan.godhassentyou!”
katerinaivanovna,hardlyknowingwhatshewasdoing,sankonherkneesbeforehim.
“apackofnonsense!”yelledluzhin,rousedtofury,“it’sallnonsenseyou’vebeentalking!‘anideastruckyou,youdidn’tthink,younoticed’—whatdoesitamountto?soigaveittoherontheslyonpurpose?whatfor?withwhatobject?whathaveitodowiththis…?”
“whatfor?that’swhatican’tunderstand,butthatwhatiamtellingyouisthefact,that’scertain!sofarfrommybeingmistaken,youinfamouscriminalman,irememberhow,onaccountofit,aquestionoccurredtomeatonce,justwheniwasthankingyouandpressingyourhand.whatmadeyouputitsecretlyinherpocket?whyyoudiditsecretly,imean?coulditbesimplytoconcealitfromme,knowingthatmyconvictionsareopposedtoyoursandthatidonotapproveofprivatebenevolence,whicheffectsnoradicalcure?well,idecidedthatyoureallywereashamedofgivingsuchalargesumbeforeme.perhaps,too,ithought,hewantstogiveherasurprise,whenshefindsawholehundred-roublenoteinherpocket.(foriknow,somebenevolentpeopleareveryfondofdeckingouttheircharitableactionsinthatway.)thentheideastruckme,too,thatyouwantedtotesther,toseewhether,whenshefoundit,shewouldcometothankyou.then,too,thatyouwantedtoavoidthanksandthat,asthesayingis,yourrighthandshouldnotknow…somethingofthatsort,infact.ithoughtofsomanypossibilitiesthatiputoffconsideringit,butstillthoughtitindelicatetoshowyouthatiknewyoursecret.butanotherideastruckmeagainthatsofyasemyonovnamighteasilylosethemoneybeforeshenoticedit,thatwaswhyidecidedtocomeinheretocallheroutoftheroomandtotellherthatyouputahundredroublesinherpocket.butonmywayiwentfirsttomadamekobilatnikov’stotakethemthe‘generaltreatiseonthepositivemethod’andespeciallytorecommendpiderit’sarticle(andalsowagner’s);thenicomeonhereandwhatastateofthingsifind!nowcouldi,couldi,havealltheseideasandreflectionsifihadnotseenyouputthehundred-roublenoteinherpocket?”
whenlebeziatnikovfinishedhislong-windedharanguewiththelogicaldeductionattheend,hewasquitetired,andtheperspirationstreamedfromhisface.hecouldnot,alas,evenexpresshimselfcorrectlyinrussian,thoughheknewnootherlanguage,sothathewasquiteexhausted,almostemaciatedafterthisheroicexploit.buthisspeechproducedapowerfuleffect.hehadspokenwithsuchvehemence,withsuchconvictionthateveryoneobviouslybelievedhim.pyotrpetrovitchfeltthatthingsweregoingbadlywithhim.