CHAPTER12

theyleftelsordo’saftereatingandstarteddownthetrail.elsordohadwalkedwiththemasfarasthelowerpost.

“salud,”hesaid.“untiltonight.”“salud,camarada,”robertjordanhadsaidtohimandthethreeofthemhadgoneondownthetrail,thedeafmanstandinglookingafterthem.mariahadturnedandwavedherhandathimandelsordowaveddisparaginglywiththeabrupt,spanishupwardflickoftheforearmasthoughsomethingwerebeingtossedawaywhichseemsthenegationofallsalutationwhichhasnottodowithbusiness.throughthemealhehadneverunbuttonedhissheepskincoatandhehadbeencarefullypolite,carefultoturnhisheadtohearandhadreturnedtospeakinghisbrokenspanish,askingrobertjordanaboutconditionsintherepublicpolitely;butitwasobvioushewantedtoberidofthem.

astheyhadlefthim,pilarhadsaidtohim,“well,santiago?”

“well,nothing,woman,”thedeafmansaid.“itisallright.butiamthinking.”

“me,too,”pilarhadsaidandnowastheywalkeddownthetrail,thewalkingeasyandpleasantdownthesteeptrailthroughthepinesthattheyhadtoiledup,pilarsaidnothing.neitherrobertjordannormariaspokeandthethreeofthemtravelledalongfastuntilthetrailrosesteeplyoutofthewoodedvalleytocomeupthroughthetimber,leaveit,andcomeoutintothehighmeadow.

itwashotinthelatemayafternoonandhalfwayupthislaststeepgradethewomanstopped.robertjordan,stoppingandlookingback,sawthesweatbeadingonherforehead.hethoughtherbrownfacelookedpallidandtheskinsallowandthatthereweredarkareasunderhereyes.

“letusrestaminute,”hesaid.“wegotoofast.”

“no,”shesaid.“letusgoon.”

“rest,pilar,”mariasaid.“youlookbadly.”

“shutup,”thewomansaid.“nobodyaskedforthyadvice.”

shestartedonupthetrailbutatthetopshewasbreathingheavilyandherfacewaswetwithperspirationandtherewasnodoubtaboutherpallornow.

“sitdown,pilar,”mariasaid.“please,pleasesitdown.”

“allright,”saidpilarandthethreeofthemsatdownunderapinetreeandlookedacrossthemountainmeadowtowherethetopsofthepeaksseemedtojutoutfromtherollofthehighcountrywithsnowshiningbrightonthemnowintheearlyafternoonsun.

“whatrottenstuffisthesnowandhowbeautifulitlooks,”pilarsaid.“whatanillusionisthesnow.”sheturnedtomaria.“iamsorryiwasrudetothee,guapa.idon’tknowwhathasheldmetoday.ihaveaneviltemper.”

“inevermindwhatyousaywhenyouareangry,”mariatoldher.“andyouareangryoften.”

“nay,itisworsethananger,”pilarsaid,lookingacrossatthepeaks.

“thouartnotwell,”mariasaid.

“neitherisitthat,”thewomansaid.“comehere,guapa,andputthyheadinmylap.”

mariamovedclosetoher,putherarmsoutandfoldedthemasonedoeswhogoestosleepwithoutapillowandlaywithherheadonherarms.sheturnedherfaceupatpilarandsmiledatherbutthebigwomanlookedonacrossthemeadowatthemountains.shestrokedthegirl’sheadwithoutlookingdownatherandranabluntfingeracrossthegirl’sforeheadandthenaroundthelineofherearanddownthelinewherethehairgrewonherneck.

“youcanhaveherinalittlewhile,inglé,”shesaid.robertjordanwassittingbehindher.

“donottalklikethat,”mariasaid.

“yes,hecanhavethee,”pilarsaidandlookedatneitherofthem.“ihaveneverwantedthee.butiamjealous.”

“pilar,”mariasaid.“donottalkthus.”

“hecanhavethee,”pilarsaidandranherfingeraroundthelobeofthegirl’sear.“butiamveryjealous.”

“butpilar,”mariasaid.“itwastheeexplainedtometherewasnothinglikethatbetweenus.”

“thereisalwayssomethinglikethat,”thewomansaid.“thereisalwayssomethinglikesomethingthatthereshouldnotbe.butwithmethereisnot.trulythereisnot.iwantthyhappinessandnothingmore.”

mariasaidnothingbutlaythere,tryingtomakeherheadrestlightly.

“listen,guapa,”saidpilarandranherfingernowabsentlybuttracinglyoverthecontoursofhercheeks.“listen,guapa,ilovetheeandhecanhavethee,iamnotortillerabutawomanmadeformen.thatistrue.butnowitgivesmepleasuretosaythus,inthedaytime,thaticareforthee.”

“ilovethee,too.”

“quéva.donottalknonsense.thoudostnotknowevenofwhatispeak.”

“iknow.”

“quéva,thatyouknow.youarefortheinglé.thatisseenandasitshouldbe.thatiwouldhave.anythingelseiwouldnothave.idonotmakeperversions.ionlytellyousomethingtrue.fewpeoplewillevertalktotheetrulyandnowomen.iamjealousandsayitanditisthere.andisayit.”

“donotsayit,”mariasaid.“donotsayit,pilar.”

“porqué,donotsayit,”thewomansaid,stillnotlookingateitherofthem.“iwillsayituntilitnolongerpleasesmetosayit.and,”shelookeddownatthegirlnow,“thattimehascomealready.idonotsayitmore,youunderstand?”

“pilar,”mariasaid.“donottalkthus.”

“thouartaverypleasantlittlerabbit,”pilarsaid.“andliftthyheadnowbecausethissillinessisover.”

“itwasnotsilly,”saidmaria.“andmyheadiswellwhereitis.”

“nay.liftit,”pilartoldherandputherbighandsunderthegirl’sheadandraisedit.“andthou,inglé?”shesaid,stillholdingthegirl’sheadasshelookedacrossatthemountains.“whatcathaseatenthytongue?”

“nocat,”robertjordansaid.

“whatanimalthen?”shelaidthegirl’sheaddownontheground.

“noanimal,”robertjordantoldher.

“youswallowedityourself,eh?”

“iguessso,”robertjordansaid.

“anddidyoulikethetaste?”pilarturnednowandgrinnedathim.

“notmuch.”

“ithoughtnot,”pilarsaid.“ithoughtnot.butigiveyoubackourrabbit.noreverdiditrytotakeyourrabbit.that’sagoodnameforher.iheardyoucallherthatthismorning.”

robertjordanfelthisfaceredden.

“youareaveryhardwoman,”hetoldher.

“no,”pilarsaid.“butsosimpleiamverycomplicated.areyouverycomplicated,inglé?”

“no.nornotsosimple.”