第580章

第580章“mychild,”shesaid,“iloveyou,andhaveknownyoualongwhile.”

inspiteofheremotion,princessmaryaknewitwasthecountess,andthatshemustsaysomethingtoher.notknowinghowshedidit,sheutteredsomepolitefrenchphrasesinthetoneinwhichshehadbeenaddressed,andasked,“howishe？”

“thedoctorsaysthereisnodanger,”saidthecountess;butasshesaiditshesighed,andturnedhereyesupwards,andthisgesturecontradictedherwords.

“whereishe？caniseehim;cani？”askedtheprincess.

“inaminute;inaminute,mydear.isthishisson？”shesaid,turningtonikolushka,whocameinwithdessalle.“weshallfindroomforeveryone;thehouseislarge.oh,whatacharmingboy！”

thecountessledtheprincessintothedrawing-room.sonyabegantoconversewithmademoisellebourienne.thecountesscaressedthechild.theoldcountcameintotheroomtowelcometheprincess.hewasextraordinarilychangedsinceprincessmaryahadseenhimlast.thenhehadbeenajaunty,gay,self-confidentoldgentleman,nowheseemedapitiful,bewilderedcreature.ashetalkedtotheprincess,hewascontinuallylookingabouthim,asthoughaskingeveryoneifheweredoingtherightthing.afterthedestructionofmoscowandthelossofhisproperty,drivenoutofhisaccustomedrut,hehadvisiblylostthesenseofhisownimportance,andfeltthattherewasnoplaceforhiminlife.

inspiteofheronedesiretoseeherbrotherwithoutlossoftime,andhervexationthatatthatmoment,whenallshewantedwastoseehim,theyshouldentertainherconventionallywithpraisesofhernephew,theprincessobservedallthatwaspassingaroundher,andfeltitinevitableforthetimetofallinwiththeneworderofthingsintowhichshehadentered.sheknewthatallthiswasinevitable,anditwashardforher,butshefeltnogrudgeagainstthemforit.

“thisismyniece,”saidthecountess,presentingsonya;“youdonotknowher,princess？”

princessmaryaturnedtoher,andtryingtosmotherthefeelingofhostilitythatroseupwithinheratthesightofthisgirl,shekissedher.butshefeltpainfullyhowoutofkeepingwasthemoodofeveryonearoundherwithwhatwasfillingherownbreast.

“whereishe？”sheaskedoncemore,addressingthemall.

“heisdownstairs;natashaiswithhim,”answeredsonya,flushing.“wehavesenttoask.youaretired,iexpect,princess？”

tearsofvexationcameintoprincessmarya’seyes.sheturnedawayandwasabouttoaskthecountessagainwhereshecouldseehim,whensheheardatthedoorlight,eagerstepsthatsoundedtoherfullofgaiety.shelookedroundandsaw,almostrunningin,natasha—thatnatashawhomshehadsodislikedwhentheymetlongbeforeinmoscow.

butprincessmaryahadhardlyglancedatnatasha’sfacebeforesheunderstoodthatherewasonewhosincerelysharedhergrief,andwasthereforeherfriend.sheflewtomeether,andembracingher,burstintotearsonhershoulder.

assoonasnatasha,sittingbyprinceandrey’sbedside,heardofprincessmarya’sarrival,shewentsoftlyoutoftheroomwiththoseswiftstepsthattoprincessmaryasoundedsolight-hearted,andrantoseeher.

assheranintotheroom,heragitatedfaceworeoneexpression—anexpressionoflove,ofboundlessloveforhim,forher,forallthatwasneartothemansheloved—anexpressionofpity,ofsufferingforothers,andofpassionatedesiretogiveherselfupentirelytohelpingthem.itwasclearthatatthatmomenttherewasnotonethoughtofself,ofherownrelationtohim,innatasha’sheart.

princessmaryawithherdelicateintuitionsawallthatinthefirstglanceatnatasha’sface,andwithmournfulreliefweptonhershoulder.

“come,letusgotohim,marie,”saidnatasha,drawingherawayintothenextroom.

princessmaryaliftedupherhead,driedhereyes,andturnedtonatasha.shefeltthatfromhershewouldlearnall,wouldunderstandall.“how…”shewasbeginning,butstoppedshort.shefeltthatnoquestionnoranswercouldbeputintowords.natasha’sfaceandeyeswouldbesuretotellherallmoreclearlyandmoreprofoundly.

natashalookedather,butseemedtobeindreadandindoubtwhethertosayornottosayallsheknew;sheseemedtofeelthatbeforethoseluminouseyes,piercingtotheverybottomofherheart,itwasimpossiblenottotellthewhole,wholetruthasshesawit.natasha’slipsuddenlytwitched,uglycreasescameroundhermouth,andshebrokeintosobs,hidingherfaceinherhands.

princessmaryakneweverything.

butstillshecouldnotgiveuphope,andaskedinwords,thoughsheputnofaithinthem：

“buthowishiswound？whatishisconditionaltogether？”

“you…youwillseethat,”wasallnatashacouldsay.

theysatalittlewhilebelow,nearhisroom,tocontroltheirtearsandgointohimwithcalmfaces.

“howhasthewholeillnessgone？hashebeenworseforlong？whendidthishappen？”princessmaryaasked.

natashatoldherthatatfirsttherehadbeendangerfrominflammationandthegreatpain,butthatthathadpassedawayattroitsa,andthedoctorhadonlybeenafraidofonething—gangrene.buttheriskofthat,too,wasalmostover.whentheyreachedyaroslavl,thewoundhadbeguntosuppurate（natashaknewallaboutsuppurationandalltherestofit）,andthedoctorhadsaidthatthesuppurationmightfollowtheregularcourse.feverhadsetin.thedoctorhadsaidthisfeverwasnotsoserious.“buttwodaysago,”natashabegan,“allofasuddenthischangecame…”sheledwithhersobs.“idon’tknowwhy,butyouwillseethechangeinhim.”

“heisweaker？thinner？…”queriedtheprincess.

“no,notthat,butworse.youwillsee.omarie,heistoogood,hecannot,hecannotlive,because…”