第502章

第502章hefeltashamed,andputhisarmoverhislegs,fromwhichhiscloakhadinfactslippedoff.foraninstantpierreopenedhiseyesashepulledupthecloak,andsawthesameroofs,andposts,andyard,butitwasnowfullofbluishlight,andglisteningwithdeworfrost.

“it’sgettinglight,”thoughtpierre.“butthat’snotthepoint.iwanttohearandunderstandthebenefactor’swords.”

hemuffledhimselfinthecloakagain,butthemasonicdinnerandhisbenefactorwouldnotcomeback.allthatremainedwerethoughts,clearlyexpressedinwords,ideas;somevoicewasspeaking,orpierrewasthinking.

whenherecalledthosethoughtslater,althoughtheyhadbeenevokedbytheimpressionsofthatday,pierrewasconvincedthattheywereutteredbysomeoneoutsidehimself.itseemedtohimthathehadneverbeencapableofthinkingthosethoughtsandexpressingtheminthatforminhiswakingmoments.

“themostdifficultthingisthesubjectionofman’swilltothelawofgod,”saidthevoice.“simplicityisthesubmissiontogod;thereisnoescapingfromhim.andtheyaresimple.theydonottalk,butact.awordutteredissilver,butunutteredisgolden.noonecanbemasterofanythingwhilehefearsdeath.andallthingsbelongtohimwhofearsitnot.ifitwerenotforsuffering,amanwouldknownothislimits,wouldknownothimself.thehardestthing”（pierrethoughtorheardinhisdream）“istoknowhowtouniteinone’ssoulthesignificanceofthewhole.tounitethewhole？”pierresaidtohimself.“no,nottounite.onecannotuniteone’sthoughts,buttoharnesstogetherallthoseideas,that’swhat’swanted.yes,onemustharnesstogether,harnesstogether,”pierrerepeatedtohimselfwithathrillofecstasy,feelingthatthosewords,andonlythosewords,expressedwhathewantedtoexpress,andsolvedthewholeproblemfrettinghim.

“yes,onemustharnesstogether;it’stimetoharness…”

“wewanttoharnessthehorses;it’stimetoharnessthehorses,yourexcellency！yourexcellency,”somevoicewasrepeating,“wewanttoharnessthehorses;it’stime…”

itwasthegroomwakingpierre.thesunwasshiningfullinpierre’sface.heglancedatthedirtytavernyard;atthewellinthemiddleofitsoldierswerewateringtheirthinhorses;andonsweremovingoutofthegate.

heturnedawaywithrepugnance,andshuttinghiseyes,madehastetohuddleupagainontheseatofthecarriage.“no,idon’twantthat;idon’twanttoseeandunderstandthat;iwanttounderstandwhatwasrevealedtomeinmysleep.anothersecondandishouldhaveunderstooditall.butwhatamitodo？toharness,buthowtoharnessalltogether？”andpierrefeltwithhorrorthatthewholemeaningofwhathehadseenandthoughtinhisdreamhadslippedaway.

thegroom,thecoachman,andtheportertoldpierrethatanofficerhadcomewiththenewsthatthefrenchwereadvancingonmozhaiskandourtroopswereretreating.

pierregotup,andorderingthecarriagetobegotoutandtodriveafterhim,crossedthetownonfoot.

thetroopsweremarchingout,leavingtensofthousandsofwoundedbehind.thewoundedcouldbeseenatthewindowsofthehouses,andwerecrowdingtheyardsandstreets.screams,oaths,andblowscouldbeheardinthestreetsaboutthecartswhichweretocarryawaythewounded.pierreputhiscarriageattheserviceofawoundedgeneralofhisacquaintance,anddrovewithhimtomoscow.onthewayhewastoldofthedeathofhisbrother-in-law,anatole,andofthedeathofprinceandrey.