第78章

第78章raskolnikovgotup,andsatdownonthesofa.hewavedhishandweaklytorazumihintocutshorttheflowofwarmandincoherentconsolationshewasaddressingtohismotherandsister,tookthembothbythehandandforaminuteortwogazedfromonetotheotherwithoutspeaking.hismotherwasalarmedbyhisexpression.itrevealedanemotionagonisinglypoignant,andatthesametimesomethingimmovable,almostinsane.pulcheriaalexandrovnabegantocry.

avdotyaromanovnawaspale;herhandtrembledinherbrother’s.

“gohome…withhim,”hesaidinabrokenvoice,pointingtorazumihin,“good-byetillto-morrow;to-morroweverything…isitlongsinceyouarrived?”

“thisevening,rodya,”answeredpulcheriaalexandrovna,“thetrainwasawfullylate.but,rodya,nothingwouldinducemetoleaveyounow!iwillspendthenighthere,nearyou…”

“don’ttortureme!”hesaidwithagestureofirritation.

“iwillstaywithhim,”criedrazumihin,“iwon’tleavehimforamoment.botherallmyvisitors!letthemragetotheirhearts’content!myuncleispresidingthere.”

“how,howcanithankyou!”pulcheriaalexandrovnawasbeginning,oncemorepressingrazumihin’shands,butraskolnikovinterruptedheragain.

“ican’thaveit!ican’thaveit!”herepeatedirritably,“don’tworryme!enough,goaway…ican’tstandit!”

“come,mamma,comeoutoftheroomatleastforaminute,”douniawhisperedindismay;“wearedistressinghim,that’sevident.”

“mayn’tilookathimafterthreeyears?”weptpulcheriaalexandrovna.

“stay,”hestoppedthemagain,“youkeepinterruptingme,andmyideasgetmuddled.…haveyouseenluzhin?”

“no,rodya,butheknowsalreadyofourarrival.wehaveheard,rodya,thatpyotrpetrovitchwassokindastovisityoutoday,”pulcheriaalexandrovnaaddedsomewhattimidly.

“yes…hewassokind…dounia,ipromisedluzhini’dthrowhimdownstairsandtoldhimtogotohell.…”

“rodya,whatareyousaying!surely,youdon’tmeantotellus…”pulcheriaalexandrovnabeganinalarm,butshestopped,lookingatdounia.

avdotyaromanovnawaslookingattentivelyatherbrother,waitingforwhatwouldcomenext.bothofthemhadheardofthequarrelfromnastasya,sofarasshehadeededinunderstandingandreportingit,andwereinpainfulperplexityandsuspense.

“dounia,”raskolnikovcontinuedwithaneffort,“idon’twantthatmarriage,soatthefirstopportunityto-morrowyoumustrefuseluzhin,sothatwemayneverhearhisnameagain.”

“goodheavens!”criedpulcheriaalexandrovna.

“brother,thinkwhatyouaresaying!”avdotyaromanovnabeganimpetuously,butimmediatelycheckedherself.“youarenotfittotalknow,perhaps;youaretired,”sheaddedgently.

“youthinkiamdelirious?no…youaremarryingluzhinformysake.butiwon’tacceptthesacrifice.andsowritealetterbeforeto-morrow,torefusehim…letmereaditinthemorningandthatwillbetheendofit!”

“thatican’tdo!”thegirlcried,offended,“whatrighthaveyou…”

“dounia,youarehasty,too,bequiet,to-morrow…don’tyousee…”themotherinterposedindismay.“bettercomeaway!”

“heisraving,”razumihincriedtipsily,“orhowwouldhedare!to-morrowallthisnonsensewillbeover…to-dayhecertainlydiddrivehimaway.thatwasso.andluzhingotangry,too.…hemadespeecheshere,wantedtoshowoffhislearningandhewentoutcrest-fallen.…”

“thenit’strue?”criedpulcheriaalexandrovna.

“good-byetillto-morrow,brother,”saiddouniacompassionately—“letusgo,mother…good-bye,rodya.”

“doyouhear,sister,”herepeatedafterthem,makingalasteffort,“iamnotdelirious;thismarriageis—aninfamy.letmeactlikeascoundrel,butyoumustn’t…oneisenough…andthoughiamascoundrel,iwouldn’townsuchasister.it’smeorluzhin!gonow.…”

“butyou’reoutofyourmind!despot!”roaredrazumihin;butraskolnikovdidnotandperhapscouldnotanswer.helaydownonthesofa,andturnedtothewall,utterlyexhausted.avdotyaromanovnalookedwithinterestatrazumihin;herblackeyesflashed;razumihinpositivelystartedatherglance.

pulcheriaalexandrovnastoodoverwhelmed.

“nothingwouldinducemetogo,”shewhisperedindespairtorazumihin.“iwillstaysomewherehere…escortdouniahome.”

“you’llspoileverything,”razumihinansweredinthesamewhisper,losingpatience—“comeoutontothestairs,anyway.nastasya,showalight!iassureyou,”hewentoninahalfwhisperonthestairs—“thathewasalmostbeatingthedoctorandmethisafternoon!doyouunderstand?thedoctorhimself!evenhegavewayandlefthim,soasnottoirritatehim.iremaineddownstairsonguard,buthedressedatonceandslippedoff.andhewillslipoffagainifyouirritatehim,atthistimeofnight,andwilldohimselfsomemischief.…”

“whatareyousaying?”

“andavdotyaromanovnacan’tpossiblybeleftinthoselodgingswithoutyou.justthinkwhereyouarestaying!thatblackguardpyotrpetrovitchcouldn’tfindyoubetterlodgings…butyouknowi’vehadalittletodrink,andthat’swhatmakesme…swear;don’tmindit.…”

“buti’llgotothelandladyhere,”pulcheriaalexandrovnainsisted,“illbeseechhertofindsomecornerfordouniaandmeforthenight.ican’tleavehimlikethat,icannot!”