第175章

第175章“then…whothen…isthemurderer?”heaskedinabreathlessvoice,unabletorestrainhimself.

porfirypetrovitchsankbackinhischair,asthoughhewereamazedatthequestion.

“whoisthemurderer?”herepeated,asthoughunabletobelievehisears.“why,you,rodionromanovitch!youarethemurderer,”headded,almostinawhisper,inavoiceofgenuineconviction.

raskolnikovleaptfromthesofa,stoodupforafewsecondsandsatdownagainwithoututteringaword.hisfacetwitchedconvulsively.

“yourlipistwitchingjustasitdidbefore,”porfirypetrovitchobservedalmostsympathetically.“you’vebeenmisunderstandingme,ithink,rodionromanovitch,”headdedafterabriefpause,“that’swhyyouaresosurprised.icameonpurposetotellyoueverythinganddealopenlywithyou.”

“itwasnotimurderedher,”raskolnikovwhisperedlikeafrightenedchildcaughtintheact.

“no,itwasyou,yourodionromanovitch,andnooneelse,”porfirywhisperedsternly,withconviction.

theywerebothsilentandthesilencelastedstrangelylong,abouttenminutes.raskolnikovputhiselbowonthetableandpassedhisfingersthroughhishair.porfirypetrovitchsatquietlywaiting.suddenlyraskolnikovlookedscornfullyatporfiry.

“youareatyouroldtricksagain,porfirypetrovitch!youroldmethodagain.iwonderyoudon’tgetsickofit!”

“oh,stopthat,whatdoesthatmatternow?itwouldbeadifferentmatteriftherewerewitnessespresent,butwearewhisperingalone.youseeyourselfthatihavenotcometochaseandcaptureyoulikeahare.whetheryouconfessitornotisnothingtomenow;formyself,iamconvincedwithoutit.”

“ifso,whatdidyoucomefor?”raskolnikovaskedirritably.“iaskyouthesamequestionagain:ifyouconsidermeguilty,whydon’tyoutakemetoprison?”

“oh,that’syourquestion!iwillansweryou,pointforpoint.inthefirstplace,toarrestyousodirectlyisnottomyinterest.”

“howso?ifyouareconvincedyouought.…”

“ach,whatifiamconvinced?that’sonlymydreamforthetime.whyshouldiputyouinsafety?youknowthat’sit,sinceyouaskmetodoit.ificonfrontyouwiththatworkmanforinstanceandyousaytohim‘wereyoudrunkornot?whosawmewithyou?isimplytookyoutobedrunk,andyouweredrunk,too.’well,whatcouldianswer,especiallyasyourstoryisamorelikelyonethanhis?forthere’snothingbutpsychologytosupporthisevidence—that’salmostunseemlywithhisuglymug,whileyouhitthemarkexactly,fortherascalisaninveteratedrunkardandnotoriouslyso.andihavemyselfadmittedcandidlyseveraltimesalreadythatthatpsychologycanbetakenintwowaysandthatthesecondwayisstrongerandlooksfarmoreprobable,andthatapartfromthatihaveasyetnothingagainstyou.andthoughishallputyouinprisonandindeedhavecome—quitecontrarytoetiquette—toinformyouofitbeforehand,yetitellyoufrankly,alsocontrarytoetiquette,thatitwon’tbetomyadvantage.well,secondly,i’vecometoyoubecause…”

“yes,yes,secondly?”raskolnikovwaslisteningbreathless.

“because,asitoldyoujustnow,iconsiderioweyouanexplanation.idon’twantyoutolookuponmeasamonster,asihaveagenuinelikingforyou,youmaybelievemeornot.andinthethirdplacei’vecometoyouwithadirectandopenproposition—thatyoushouldsurrenderandconfess.itwillbeinfinitelymoretoyouradvantageandtomyadvantagetoo,formytaskwillbedone.well,isthisopenonmypartornot?”

raskolnikovthoughtaminute.

“listen,porfirypetrovitch.yousaidjustnowyouhavenothingbutpsychologytogoon,yetnowyou’vegoneonmathematics.well,whatifyouaremistakenyourself,now?”

“no,rodionromanovitch,iamnotmistaken.ihavealittlefacteventhen,providencesentitme.”

“whatlittlefact?”

“iwon’ttellyouwhat,rodionromanovitch.andinanycase,ihaven’ttherighttoputitoffanylonger,imustarrestyou.sothinkitover:itmakesnodifferencetomenowandsoispeakonlyforyoursake.believeme,itwillbebetter,rodionromanovitch.”

raskolnikovsmiledmalignantly.

“that’snotsimplyridiculous,it’spositivelyshameless.why,evenifiwereguilty,whichidon’tadmit,whatreasonshouldihavetoconfess,whenyoutellmeyourselfthatishallbeingreatersafetyinprison?”

“ah,rodionromanovitch,don’tputtoomuchfaithinwords,perhapsprisonwillnotbealtogetherarestfulplace.that’sonlytheoryandmytheory,andwhatauthorityamiforyou?perhaps,too,evennowiamhidingsomethingfromyou?ican’tlaybareeverything,he-he!andhowcanyouaskwhatadvantage?don’tyouknowhowitwouldlessenyoursentence?youwouldbeconfessingatamomentwhenanothermanhastakenthecrimeonhimselfandsohasmuddledthewholecase.considerthat!iswearbeforegodthatiwillsoarrangethatyourconfessionshallcomeasacompletesurprise.wewillmakeacleansweepofallthesepsychologicalpoints,ofasuspicionagainstyou,sothatyourcrimewillappeartohavebeensomethinglikeanaberration,forintruthitwasanaberration.iamanhonestman,rodionromanovitch,andwillkeepmyword.”

raskolnikovmaintainedamournfulsilenceandlethisheadsinkdejectedly.heponderedalongwhileandatlastsmiledagain,buthissmilewassadandgentle.

“no!”hesaid,apparentlyabandoningallattempttokeepupappearanceswithporfiry,“it’snotworthit,idon’tcareaboutlesseningthesentence!”

“that’sjustwhatiwasafraidof!”porfirycriedwarmlyand,asitseemed,involuntarily.“that’sjustwhatifeared,thatyouwouldn’tcareaboutthemitigationofsentence.”

raskolnikovlookedsadlyandexpressivelyathim.

“ah,don’tdisdainlife!”porfirywenton.“youhaveagreatdealofitstillbeforeyou.howcanyousayyoudon’twantamitigationofsentence?youareanimpatientfellow!”

“agreatdealofwhatliesbeforeme?”